Saturday 26 May 2012

Obi-wan-Clairenobi

Be mindful of your thoughts Claire, they'll betray you
Oh my goodness I'm getting far too into the 'Jedi Runners' chat.  Don't get me wrong I do like Star Wars, I grew up with it, my Mum loved it but isn't there a point when you should grow out of it?  Maybe I should do the Great South Run as Princess Leah? Anyway I digress, last Sunday I ran a course of just off 3 miles, all stops and starts and slow but I loved it, the endorphins were out and life was rosy. Sunday afternoon was different, the hormone Gremlins took up residence, alongside some low self esteem and a large dash of catastrophising, all doing a wonderful job of wiping out the endorphins.  This carried on for a couple of days. I wasn't mindful of my thoughts and they sent me on a brief and unpleasant journey.  From my toolkit I can use, Relaxation with Self Hypnosis, noticing that my thinking was distorted, putting two and two together and making five (in the world of hypno known as a Complex Equivalent), I could have identified my negative cognitions and restructured them, used a bit of thought stopping, the list goes on.  It was a stark reminder of how horrible we can be to ourselves, and just how prevalent it is. You'll be pleased to know that I've kicked all that into touch with a very strong right foot and will practice and refine the exercises to prevent this happening in the future.


May the Force be with you
With hormones playing a part in many women's lives, some of the effects great and some not so great I spent moment with Google and discovered that exercise can help with keeping those hormones on a more even keel, I can keep myself sane.   Fan bloody tastic, running may just help to alleviate those regular irrational outbursts, yet another incentive to get the running shoes on and get myself out.


I’ve got a very bad feeling about this
As far as I know, (I must admit my research hasn't been extensive), you should give your poor legs a break in between each run, so Monday was out.  Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday were evenings which were already planned with no room for a run, so the next opportunity was Friday after work.  I must admit after last Sunday in the cold, coming round to Friday which was hotter than the centre of a MacDonalds Apple Pie the thought of running around the common wasn't all that inviting.  Couple that with the countless young, nubile, half naked, bronzed, slim, fit, BBQing people on the common, my morale wasn't high. But, my image of myself in October being healthy, and glowing and proud having just run 10 miles was pretty good, so I began.  I walked some and ran some of the 2.23 mile route.  Some places I walked because I don't feel like a real runner yet.  I'm slow, and bits of me still wobble, and I feel self conscious but I'll keep focusing on the end goal, how I'll feel, how I'll look and that medal.  And in the meantime I'll keep doing those mental exercises to keep the force strong.


Oh and the last cigarette was on Tuesday 22nd May, still smoke free, but not yet fat free. 



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